I am always amazed when good people who are good parents turn out terrible kids and more amazed when scumbags produce good kids. I conclude that both nurture and nature have important roles in the development of children. Parenting is hard work. Generally, when parents are intentional in their parenting they will eventually see the rewards of their labors. Heartbreakingly, there are exceptions.
No one has to remain a victim of poor parenting. Every day each of us can choose to cast off the bad and embrace the good from our own upbringing. Someday your children will do the same.
If you have been a poor parent, you can change. Make one small change at a time and work to master a new trait or habit. Then address another behavior. Maybe you need to do some apologizing and perhaps you need an accountability partner.
Being a great parent is not a guarantee that you will be 100% pleased with your offspring. But don’t let that be an excuse to be a lazy parent either. The outcome is not entirely your obligation or blame.
Be the best parent you can. In about 20 years of practice you will have made some amazing discoveries and learned so much. Just when your primary parenting years come to a close, you will be ready to be an awesome grandparent.
King Solomon made this general observation and wrote it down for us, “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.”